Thursday, November 30, 2006

The games we play...

Lin dsay, Ga be Han nah, Fa ye th and I were talking about the meaning of Christmas and how Christmas Day is actually a very large celebration for the Birth of Jesus (please note we no longer say BABY Jesus as she was VERY UPSET at Easter that they crucified BABY Jesus) So she asked if we could bake a cake and play games. I said, Yes we can. So I asked what kind of game should be play. L B says, Pin the baby in the cradle. So I explained the entire manger scene and told her that they slept in the manger. She says, Did Mother Mary CO-SLEEP with Jesus. To which I answered, yes she did. She then asked, "Did Mother Mary BREASTFEED Jesus. I replied, "Yes honey back then almost all children were nursed by their moms. They did not have formula back then". She then comes up with, "Mommy what is formula"? I said, "You know what formula is. It is what babies get if their mommy's do not breast feed". She replies to me, "But Mommy WHAT IS IT"? I scratch my head and tell her the truth. "Honey it is a synthetic drink made up of ingredients that babies need that mommy's give then babies when they can't or won't breastfeed. But it is not the same as breast milk. Breast milk cannot be replicated. You and Ga be were fed formula from 9 weeks on. Han nah and Fay eth got supplemented with it".
To change the subject back to the Christmas Celebration I asked, What games should we play. So she then said, Pin the Baby in Mother Mary's arms. Okay. So I asked about Thanksgiving, Halloween. Then I said, What type of Games could we play at Easter....She says...."PIN JESUS ON THE CROSS". to say my face looked like this :-O is probably and understatement. My reply was, ummm Lind say honey, I am not so sure that I am up to crucifying Jesus. That happened once dear. How about something with the Easter Bunny.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

EVIL NASTY HATEFUL EMAIL SENDING PERSON/PEOPLE...

I noticed that you again started hitting my blog on the anniversary of Gramma's death. Now that I wrote that letter to her, which is what you were looking for, will you please stop coming to my blog. I really have no desire for you to be reading about me or my family.

Dear Gramma,

The 26th was the 4 year anniversary of your death. It is so hard to believe that you have been gone for that long. The twins were not quite 10 months old. You were always so awesome to me. I completely hit the jackpot, an amazing mom and amazing Grandparents, I am so lucky. More lucky then most.

When we tried for years to get pregnant, you were always so supportive. Always listened. You would say that you had no clue what it was like to go through what we were going through, but you always let me say what I needed to say and never judged me on it. I remember mom calling you to tell you that I was pregnant. I was standing right there. But she was DYING to tell someone. I could hear you screaming for joy over the phone. When we found out it was twins, you were screaming again. You moved to North Carolina for good when I was 15 weeks pregnant. I was so sad when you and grampa left. I wanted you to be as active in my kids lives as you were in mine. It broke my heart the day you pulled away for the last time. Granted you were back in October for Josh's wedding. But it just made me so sad.

I cannot remember when you started calling the twins your "Miracle Babies" but you did. I remember you calling me to talk and telling me that you were telling the hair dresser, the checkout lady at the grocery store, the lady at the dollar store and anyone that would listen that your granddaughter was having miracle babies. You loved my babies so much before you even got to see them or hold them.

You always had this uncanny way of knowing when someone needed to talk. When something was bothering them. All of a sudden my phone would ring and there you were. You did that when I was in labor with the twins. All of a sudden you were on the phone. "So are you having those miracle babies?" And I was. You said that you would stay up and wait to hear the news. We called and you had just gone to the bathroom. Grampa answered the phone before the first ring had ended. You cried when we told you that we named Lindsay after your dad.

3 weeks later you were here. After spending 15 hours in a car you immediately came over to my house to see the Miracle babies. I think you spent every day with us for the 3+ weeks that you were here. We all cried when you left again.

You were back the beginning of May for Becca's wedding. You did not even make it to Aunt Zorrinea's house before you made Grampa stop so you could see the miracle babies. I nearly fainted when I walked in and there was Aunt Paula. You could not get enough of your miracle babies. I am not sure how many rolls of film that you took. But you had to have your pictures to show everyone. Of course when you left again we all cried. We never realized that that would be your last visit home. The night you got home you had a "gall bladder attack". I told you it sounded more like a heart attack but you would not go to the hospital.

Now that I think back about it, that was the way you wanted to go. Your last visit here you were glowing. You were beautiful. You were just so happy. You got to see all your friends for the last time the way you wanted to.

We came down in August for the family reunion. We had an awesome time. I am not sure that there was a moment that you were not holding one of the miracle babies. We had to go ALL OVER NC to show everyone your miracle grandbabies. You loved them so much.

In September Darren, the twins and I went to Asheville for a getting together with some friends. They were going to go to the Builtmore Estate so we decided to drive over and see you. That was Friday and we were not suppose to come until Sunday. You and I sat on the floor playing with your miracle babies and you said, "So I take it that you came because your grampa has a huge aneurysm that could blow at anytime". LOL, no, I came to see you all but tell me about this aneurysm. Grampa was going to see a specialist about this huge aneurysm in a couple weeks. Your face was all puffy and the walk in clinic told you that you had a sinus infection. We spent 2 amazing days with you and grampa. We had so many great talks. You told me who and what was special to you and your heart. You swore me to not repeat these things to some people. We were so close.

We got home September 24th. September 29th I was at moms. Paula called to talk to me. Then grampa called. You were swollen in your face, neck, arms. I told them that you could have been going into congestive heart failure. GO TO THE HOSPITAL. You were stubborn and finally I just yelled at you to get your ass at the hospital now.

I spent a long time trying to get a hold of you. For some odd reason I knew something was wrong. I could not reach you at home or on your cell phone. So I called the hospital. They put Aunt Paula on the phone. Grampa was in the van. He was not feeling well. (aneurysms have a way of doing that) Aunt Paula told me that your chest xray had an area of abnormality. You asked me what that could be and I lied to her. I told her...Oh it could just be that she was exposed to TB. I COULD NOT tell her you had lung cancer. I knew from the terminology that it was lung cancer. Mom had gone to the bathroom. I told Becca what I found out and what I knew it was. Mom got out of the bathroom and I told her about the chest xray. I told her what I told Aunt Paula and mom looked at me in the eyes. She KNEW I was lying. She could see in my eyes what I had told Becca. We opted not to tell Zorrinea what we knew it was. We just told her an abnormal area.

I went home, told Darren that you had cancer and packed my bags. At 11 pm that night I got the phone call from my mom. I then 4 minutes later got a phone call from Zorrinea screaming. Ever so mellow dramatic. We left 9/30/02 1:00am to head to NC. Me, mom, the twins, zorrinea and cassie.

Those next 8 weeks were awesome. I spent 4.5 of them with you. When they called to tell me that you could not take any more chemo and that your heart was too badly damaged from the heart attack that you sustained at the beginning of November, I came down. I had to tell you good bye one talk time. Who knew that this visit was the most important visit in my little mans life.

The night I arrived we ate then I came with the twins, aunt paula and mom and rick to the hospital. When I walked into your room you looked so sad. The fire was gone from your eyes. You told me that you did not want to die yet. You wanted to see the miracle babies grow up and get married. How I sat there and did not start sobbing I have no clue. Just thinking about that moment now makes me cry.

You were too weak to hold the babies. I put Gabe in bed with you and you would just loving on him and rubbing his head and you told me, "He has a ridge here". I promised you that I would get it checked out. Who would have known that that comment would save Gabe's life. You died so I would be there and you could find that ridge. That is why you died. You saved your miracle baby's life. I cannot look at Gabe's scar without thinking of you.

8 months 10 days after you died, I gave birth to Hannah Euphene. You had told me at Becca's wedding that we wanted Darren and I just to take a pregnancy test and be pregnant. A surprise. That was Hannah. You told me back after I had the twins that I needed to name our next baby girl Hannah Euphene. That you just LOVED the name Hannah and if you had to live with the middle name Euphene then so should someone else.

We joke that for Hannah never knowing you she sure does act just like you. Compassionate and stubborn. A loving soul who can make everyone laugh.

I miss you so much. I look at my Christmas tree and I think of you. That is a story for another day.

I love you, I miss you, I thank you.

Monday, November 27, 2006

A few funnies from the week...

Darren is in the midst of telling the kids a story. He goes "Chapter by chapter". It is the story of how we met and how we got to the point that we are now. Last week Darren was telling them about how we got pregnant with the twins. He says, "The Dr called and said", Hannah did not miss a beat. She yells, "NO MORE MONKEYS JUMPING ON THE BED!" LOL Darren did not find it quite as amusing as I did. But he still thought it was funny.

We have all had special names for the kids while they were in my tummy. The twins of course were Baby A and Baby B. Hannah was Baby Cookie. Fayeth was Baby Boots the Monkey. That same night she asked, Where was I when the twins were in Mommy's tummy? Darren said, You were still an egg in Mommy's ovary. She laughed and told him, "Don't be silly daddy. I was a COOKIE in mommy's ovary".

Friday night we went to the Circus. LB made 2 new friends. They kept petting LBs hair and kept remarking how straight and soft it was. LB would say Thank you and the cycle would start again. Finally LB told them that she was not a dog and she did not need petted. The girls again told her that her hair was so soft and straight. On the way home LB was asking, "Mommy, why were they "petting" my hair and telling me how straight and soft my hair was?" So I explained. "Honey most people with a black skin color have very curly hair and they have to go through great measures to straighten their hair. Your hair is naturally (PAINFULLY) straight". She then again asked, "WHY are they lucky to have curly hair?" I replied, "Honey it is in their GENES". Lb replied, "Ok". Now I could HEAR her thinking. All of a sudden I hear, "Mommy, you know how I have to have my hair in ringlets for the Nutcracker", "Yes honey", "Instead of buying me those icky hair extension can you just buy me a pair of their JEANS?" LOL I tried hard to stifle a giggle and then had to explain GENES and DNA. Which then turned into a LONG talk on that. (Homeschooling at its finest :))

Sunday, November 26, 2006

A F ay e th Brag...

I cannot help it I must share...

Fa ye th LOVES her potty chair. The one we have downstairs she will pull into he livingroom to sit on it and watch TV. Last night we decided to move a potty chair upstairs too. F ay eth was so excited. She pulled Gramma by her finger down the hall to show her the potty chair. We let her sit on it with no diaper on and she was just so excited. We showed her how to close the lid and she is just ALL THAT ;).

Today I am making dinner and F ay eth comes up to me and grabs my finger and PULLS me. I follow her down the hall and she goes into the bathroom. She then points at the potty and screams. (She is NONVERBAL, that is her means of communication) I ask, Do you want to use the potty? She nods yes and I remove her diaper. She sits on the potty and starts to grunt. Next thing I hear is a PLOP and we have poop. She claps for herself. Closes the toilet seat walks over to the bathroom door and yells. I call the kids and they come. She lifts the lid and shows them her surprise and then points to her butt. Then they all Clap and Cheer and all if right in the world.

She is such a smug little thing. Let me tell you. She is SO proud of herself. If you ask her if she pooped in the potty she gets all excited and cheers for herself.

Saturday, November 18, 2006

How Darren spent his vacation...

Yes. That would be my husband. On the roof hanging lights. He has decided to be competitive with our neighbor. Our neighbor had his lights up last week. (Darren worked, Joe is retired) Now if I could just get him to rid our yard of the leaves like Joe does, we would be in business. ;) The rest of our outdoor decorations will be up in the next 2 days.





Thursday we put up our trees. Yes we have 2. One upstairs and one downstairs. This is our upstairs tree. The kids and I decorated it yesterday while Daddy was on the roof. He said he had enough fun putting up the lights.




This is our tree downstairs. You can see how well my husband puts lights on the tree. It drives me insane but I am trying to ignore it. Atleast I did not have to put lights on the tree.


This is how Gabe puts ornaments on the tree. He lines EVERYTHING up. Ornaments, his food when he eats, his shoes. I told him that with tree decorating we do NOT line things up. LOL
I have already been listening to Christmas music. To be completely honest with you, I have become my mom. Just not that bad. Back when I was in highschool, she would start listening to christmas music starting in September. In past years I have hated to put up my decorations. I was just indifferent to decorating. Now I am not. I am having so much fun. I wanted my trees and decorations up for Thanksgiving Day. We will turn them on Thursday.
I will keep you updated with CLARK's (aka Darren's) need to best the neighbor. This could be interesting. LOL

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Why I wont file a complaint...THIS TIME

So many of you have told me to file a complaint. THIS TIME I will not. Since this person is a part of my online FAMILY (meaning they have access to a computer and may or may not be an actual member of my FAMILY) the other online FAMILY members that I have discussed this with feel that THIS TIME we will let it slide with a WARNING. Sort of a WE KNOW YOU DID IT. However, I have been giving full permission and support of my online FAMILY that if it happens again to file the complaint. You can sort of say we are trying to handle this internally. If I had my way, I would have filed the complaint and been done with it.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Class In Session: IP Tracking 101.

First of all I would like to thank all of you who posted such supportive messages. I must say that it really means a lot to me. I do not think that these emails would have hurt as much if they did not come on the anniversary of Grampa’s death. Again, thank you my friends.

Class is in Session:

IP address is a number (in the form of a dotted quad) that is assigned to a computer by an Internet service provider (ISP) to be its permanent address on the Internet. Computers use IP addresses to locate and talk to each other on the Internet, much the same way people use phone numbers to locate and talk to one another on the telephone.

There are these nifty little programs that you can use to track your IP. I used them on my blog, our family web page and my business site (<--- See link over there). I like to know WHO and HOW people find my sites. You can also go as far as to track emails that you receive. Cool, don’t you think?

Miss Daisy was kind enough to foreword me these emails. Now it took me quite a long time to walk her thru forwarding them to me. The FIRST thing Darren and I checked was to see if she was sending them to herself. Well, she is not. Which I am not sure if that made me feel better or worse. Had she been sending them to herself I could say, “Wow, she is really having a hard time dealing with this.” “This is a coping mechanism”. This poor lady lost her beloved nephew and my Grampa all in about 6 weeks.

So we tracked the IP by using THIS and THIS. It was QUITE alarming what we found. This morning I decided to track my IP s that have hit my blog. Can you imagine my disbelief when I realized that the person who is sending these HATEFUL MEAN emails to Miss Daisy ALSO HAS READ MY BLOG? 6 times today as of the moment I started this entry. Yes my friends, the person harassing Miss Daisy if a part of my online family. Someone that I let read about MY FAMILY and my friends.

So, let me put this out there, You should be VERY ASHAMED of yourself. Grampa sure would have been. Harassing a 71 year old woman is PATHETIC! Besides this is VERY ILLEGAL and the next time Miss Daisy receives another email of this magnitude I will be filing a complaint on behalf of her with your provider.

P.S. I KNOW WHO YOU ARE!

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Dear Grampa,

One year ago today you left us. You went to be with the love of your life, Gramma. I never in a million years would have thought that you would have outlived Gramma. You were older and less healthy (though still healthy by many standards). We NEVER thought that you would have survived if Gramma went first.

When gramma was sick, you were a rock. You loved her, supported her, and held her hand as she died. You were strong for all of us, the kids and the grandkids. I worried about you so much after she died. I just did not know if you would manage. For 17 months you sat on the couch. You mourned Gramma. You started to live your life again, but you just looked so sad. You started dating and while it was a shock to some, I am glad that you did. You found Miss Daisy and she put the smile back on your face and the glint in your eye.

After Gramma died I got to know an entirely new man. You were always the strong silent support behind the strong and forward Gramma. You were so silly with Miss Daisy. Now, I do not always agree with or even like Miss Daisy 100% of the time. Sometimes I do wonder when you had your heart attack why she did not give you a nitro, but I cannot blame her. Shame on me for the times that I did. I did not walk in her foot steps. I do not know how devastating it was to her to find you. But, she made you happy.

You were always an amazing man. You were a great father figure. From letting me paint your toenails to putting curlers in your hair to our early morning coffee dates when I was 5, you were always so amazing to me.

Mom always says, “Any man can be a FATHER, but it take a special man to be a DAD!” She is so right. Biologically you were not my grampa. But that does not matter. I can remember the time when I was around 6 maybe 7 that I was informed that you were not my “REAL” grampa. But that never mattered to you, because in your eyes I WAS your granddaughter. You always made me feel like I belonged in our family of his, mine and ours.

Someone is doing your honor to shame. Some nasty evil person is emailing Miss Daisy saying that they are you. They are doing it from your email addy. Or they are changing it to make it look like it is coming from your email addy. Aunt Paula gets so sad when this happens. This person does not realize that they are making HER life hard.

1 day shy of your 6 month anniversary of your death this email was sent to her:
“I still get my mail here...Why don't you do the right thing for my family now...Everything belongs to them the house stocks bonds van and all..They told me you were a gold digger and now I can srr it from here that they were so right..You had a few of them fooled but not them all.. ART”

Today she got: “WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME?

I will get to the bottom of this. There is this amazing little thing called an IP addy. That means that we can track this. Paula is going to the attorney tomorrow. This will be resolved. Your honor will be restored.

I love you and I miss you!

Sunday, November 05, 2006

Very resourceful

Thursday when we were coming home from the peds office I stopped at a Gas Station. Ga be asked me what type of Fire truck was that. I looked up and it was a Blue and white truck. On the side it said "Federal Bureau of Investigation, Mobile Command Center". G abe got very excited and asked me if we could go look at the inside. I told him no, that I am not sure that the men in the truck would be real happy about that. Gab e replied, "But mommy if we tell them that we are homeschoolers and we are on a field trip. They just might". You know what buddy. You are right, but I am STILL not approaching a FBI truck. Sorry Kid. His little mind just never shuts off...

Need some help....

We are heading out East July 7-14, 2007. My husband the history freak is just wetting himself in anticipation. He is a HUGE history buff and would be happy if we spent all 3 weeks of his vacations driving from historical site to historical site. I will need to PLAN this trip for certain spots at certain times or I will never get to do what I want to (and will do) like see friends.

So, what do you recommend? I know that we will be stopping in Philly (Liberty bell) and in the Kate/Linda area. Plymouth Rock of course is on the list. He is wanting to do Gettysburg but I have been there before and dragging the kids out of carseats constantly to go and look at memorials sounds like A LOT OF WORK. Where are places that we need to see. Need to do. I am placing the fate of my trip in your suggestions. :)

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Love is...

I see other peoples blogs about Love Thursday. Well today it just happens to be Thursday so for the first time (and only time) I am going to do a Love Thursday post.

LOVE IS...

Being woke up at 5am by your husband not because he wants some lovin' but because our 4 year old son peed all over him. WOOHOO thank you Gabe for not going on me. (He has increased intracranial pressure that is WHY he has the incontience issue)

Taking 4 children to the pediatricians office to get flu shots. Of course your 1 child that NEEDS the vaccine is too sick to get it. While you are there your 18 month old falls and busts her lip (on the inside). She more than likely should have gotten stitches but we decided that we would just see how it heals on her own.

Getting home and being home for an hour and the noticing that your 4 year old daughter has a forgein body in her ear. Note that it is a peice of paper and you and the spouse attempt to irrigate it out of her ear while she tells you stories about HOW it got there.

Drive the 35 minutes BACK to the peds office to have said forgein body removed. The offending object ended up being a dum dum sucker wrapper chewed up and placed in her ear wednesday night while DADDY was on duty. (Do I need to remind you all about DAD DY, Ga be and GA BE"S object up the nose?)

Drive the 35 minutes home. Make dinner. Have 4 year old daughter help you because you have now decided that the 4 yr old is crying out for attention and you are a shitty mom.

Tuck all 4 children into their beds. THe 3 oldest giggle and laugh about things that have happened during the day. give them kisses and listen to them snore.