Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Note to self...

Fat woman wearing only panties and bra should not walk around house with blinds up on the windows. Especially when said fat woman has for sale sign out in front of her house. Cars tend to drive by slowly and look at house and see said fat lady with her back to the window. LARGE window. Fat Lady's son will then say, "Mommy there is a police car outside our window". Fat lady will scurry away from the window. Police car continues to drive past slowly.

Later Fat Lady will be loading her children into the car when a police car pulls into her driveway. Police Car contains County Deputy that Fat Lady went to highschool with. County Deputy says, "Fat Lady, what are you selling your house for?" Fat Lady replies and informs that we have an accepted offer hower county deputy can still call realtor and look at the house. County Deputy said, "Those are nice windows, you can see in your windows from the front yard. I saw you earlier." Fat lady just pretends that she does not hear County Deputy and gets children into the car.

2 comments:

Sabrina said...

I think you just made me pee my pants.. ;0)

lordhavemercy said...

yes...this brings memories of a couple of summers ago when Bri stopped by the house...
I had just gotten home from church...and there were NO CARS in my driveway...which to me translates into...NO VISITORS...which means it's completely safe for me to strip down to my panties...but, alas...as i was standing by my kitchen counter...a knock on the screen door...a quick look up...and a quick doubling over...because i was laughing so hard...however...not fast enough that Bri...(a double for Mel Gibson)through the screen-door...didn't get an eye-ful of 45 year old, southern bearing, baby nursed boobs. Needless to say...once i stopped laughing and crawled down my hallway...to put pants and a shirt on...any shred of dignity or pride was left back at my kitchen counter. Brian's comment...? "well, i've never seen anything quite like that..."
ok...my life as a sex-symbol, never did come into full fruition...
...so, i relate, Michelle...i relate...;)