HWKM.......

Let me preface this by saying that Tuesday sometime around 3am our house was hit by lightening. Our irrigation system control panel was completely fried and burnt inside. The power cord was blown apart, the GFCI that it was plugged into was burned, our garage door opener was fried, our house alarm was fried, a ceiling fan, 8 light bulbs blown, our cable line was melted into the port and barely attached to the house, the splitter attached to the main cable line was blown and we think that was it. So we have been replacing things out of our pocket as it will be less than paying our deductible and turning it into our home owners. We are slightly concerned that since my insurance company just settled with a girl who was suing me due to an accident that I was sort of in (LONG STORY) we are afraid that we might be canceled. I will say this much about the accident. My car never touched theirs. She was the passenger and she sued ME and not the driver of the other car. (STUPID)

However, since my ceiling fan in my bedroom was already messed up we decided to go ahead and replace that one while replacing the one in the living room. Of course we have 2 in our living room and if you replace one you have to replace the other. So, we purchased 3 ceiling fans w/ light kits.

He who knows more than everyone else starts taking down the old fan, and starts assembling the new one. I say, "Honey do you think that you should read the directions?" He who knows more says, "Nope, I got it under control." I just shake my head and walk away to start dinner. The directions says 2 hours to assemble.

He gets the fan to be mounted to the ceiling and realizes that the old mounting thing wont work so he has to UNWIRE everything and take it down to replace the black mounting thing. So, he replaced the black thingy, rewires the fan, mounts it to the ceiling. By this time he only has to attach the fan blades. However, HE WHO KNOWS MORE had already installed the light kit. So HE WHO KNOWS MORE has to remove the light kit and attach the fan blades and re install the light kit. By now, SHE WHO TOLD HIM TO READ THE DIRECTIONS was PISSED and decided to start dinner with out him. What SHOULD have taken HE WHO KNOWS MORE 90 minutes took just a smidge UNDER 180 minutes.

However I love my new fan and lights.

Today, HE WHO KNOWS MORE was mowing the grass before work when the mower ran out of gas. HE WHO KNOWS MORE needed to go get gasoline. So he goes. He comes back and tells me, "The mower won't start I have the battery attached to the charger". Me "Okay". He decided to go work on the pool. Because of all this rain we needed to drain the pool since the water was up to the edge of the liner. So, HE WHO KNOWS MORE works on the pool. My mom stops by and we have lunch. I am telling my mom (aka 20+ years of hardware store knowledge) that the mower is not working no matter how long we have it attached to charger. I then bruide HE WHO KNOWS MORE ego when I ask him, "Do we know for a fact that the outlet you have it plugged into did not sustain damage during the storm". HE WHO KNOWS MORE has to be snippy and say, "Well YEAH! You touch the 2 things together and they spark". WHOA OKAY BUDDY...JUST TROUBLE SHOOTING. So, I tell HE WHO KNOWS MORE to take the battery out and I will go buy a new one since our yard looks like an over grown field. So HE WHO KNOWS MORE goes out side and I can hear him taking everything apart and then I hear "DAMMIT!!!" Well HE WHO KNOWS MORE left the friggin' mower deck in ENGAGE. HENCE WHY the mower WILL NOT START. So HE WHO KNOWS MORE put everything back and now gets to go to work while *I* mow.

Love you Buddy,
Remember all those nice things I said about you the other day???

I.TAKE.THEM.BACK! ;)